Had kind of a melt down about two weeks ago. See, I had two small heart attacks the end of December and the beginning of January.
This spread is a bunch of photos taken with the little Zumi camera I had in my purse while in the hospital.
I'm OK, but now on drugs that cost over $300.00 dollars every month. Made me feel kind of weird and dizzy too, the first few weeks I was taking them. There's a blood thinner that makes every pin prick bleed for an hour.
At first I was in shock. This couldn't be happening to me! I have been walking almost every morning since the birth of my second child, 34 years ago. I have been on a low fat, no meat, low salt diet for years and years since it seemed like the healthiest and sanest thing to do. grrrr
A week after I came home I got sick with a cold. Am still coughing now! Fevers still coming and going. Rats! This is pissin' me off. This is the anger stage. Then I got sad. Now I am used to the idea. All stages of grief for the official loss of my youth. grrr.
Guess I shouldn't be surprised. My mom died of a second heart attack when she was only 60 years old.
And you know what, she died on the same date that I had my second one. January 3rd. How weird is that?
Sure do wish we had health insurance. But, maybe it's a wash. If we could pay $2000.00 a month for the basic plan we could qualify for, it would have been $24,000.00 a year. By the time we get the bill for this fiasco, with the cost of E.R. care, in patient time, blood tests, a bill from an ambulance company for transfering me to a hospital that has a cardiac cath lab, and individual physician charges, I bet it will all add up to about that.
This sucks. But, I am over it now. I am glad to still be here to have this worry. I see beauty everywhere as I always do and now am even happier I have had more time to enjoy it.
Remember these words of Maya Angelou: "Not everything you do is going to be a masterpiece, but you get art there and you try and sometimes it really happens. The other times you're just stretching your soul."